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Monday, January 26, 2009

Can "Relationship-ized" Folk Safely Have Cross-Gender Relationships

When Suzanne Babb, a 34-year-old professional organizer from Gilbert, Arizona, is having a bad hair day, she does what many women do. She calls her best friend.
"I'll be crying my eyes out and will say, 'I'm fat and ugly, and I don't have a boyfriend,'" she says. "Then Eric will come over and tell me I'm pretty, and we'll watch '300.' It's like having all the benefits of a really great husband -- without having to do the laundry."
Babb is one of many adults whose platonic friendship contradicts the old "When Harry Met Sally" maxim about sex always getting in the way of men and women being buddies. Though they have been close since high school, Babb says she and Eric have never even kissed.
"It would be like kissing my brother," she says. "Ewwwww."
Although opposite-sex friends inevitably hook up in movies and on TV (Chandler and Monica, anyone?), many people think that it is possible to be platonic pals.
http://www.cnn.com/2009/LIVING/personal/01/23/lw.opposite.sex.friends/index.html?eref=rss_topstories

I tend to agree with Harry... sex always gets in the way.  Unless someone is too "something" (old, skinny, fat... not much else), sex always gets in the way.  And, for men I believe that is generally true.  (Don't call me a pervert, you low life ignorant pee brain!  Read The Hite Report on Men, or the Kinsey Report, or any of a host of studies on male sexuality.)

Seraphina and I have always thought it best to have mutual friends, and avoid one-on-one friendships with the opposite sex.  And, we generally do avoid such situations.  But, sometimes circumstances dictate otherwise.  

Recently, a good friend of ours, a woman moved in with us while job hunting.  Then, Seraphina left town to visit a good friend of ours with cancer.  I was left in the same house with a woman my age.  Even one I had dated (once) in high school.

We watched movies together and enjoyed visiting.  So, we don't always hold to the Verboten! rule of ours when it comes to opposite sex friendships.  But, we don't hunt for them either.  And, truthfully, I avoid them by policy unless circumstances clearly indicate otherwise.

After all, if we both didn't have some self control, I suspect the Japanese company Canon (see previous post) and the geneticists that want our gene pool spread far and wide with as many combinations as possible, would have been happy with both our contributions!

Pooch Dog

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